Tag: movies

My self-care basket

Things in My basket for a bad day

  • Self care basket
  • Chocolate brownies or cake
  • Pretzels
  • Pepsi
  • Coffee with flavored creamers
  • Dial shower gel (I love the feel and smell.)
  • Notebooks
  • Color pens
  • A book with a good twist
  • Pillows
  • Movies: comedies and chick flicks
  • My tablet with my personal play list (music)
  • Headset

Levels of Depression

Level One

  • Just feeling blah/blue, but can be shaken off
  • Just general sad feeling
  • Feeling sluggish
  • Mood swings, but mild: they can be talked out
  • Can still get up and function


Level Two

  • Mood swings can go from content to blah 
  • Easily bored
  • Things take a bit more energy
  • Want to cry
  • Telling jokes may help

Level three 

  • Things can take longer to do
  • May talk slower
  • Harder to make a decision 
  • May nap more
  • Have to push yourself to get motivated
  • Going for a walk may help

Level four

  • Restless and exercise may not help
  • May snap or bitch for no reason
  • Doesn’t want to go out
  • Venting may not help or feels stuck and can’t vent
  • Shopping may help (temporarily)
  • Activities like sex just feel like a chore (they to require more energy than normal.)

Note: Usually after Level Four these don‘t work or they take more work to achieve. 

  • Talking out feeling, but feelings linger
  • Some dark feelings pop up, but disappear
  • Sometimes chocolate or caffeine helps
  • Sometimes walking or exercise can help
  • Talking out out feelings
  • Talking a shower or bath with favorite soap

Level five

  • Doesn’t brush teeth 
  • May have headache (lacking caffeine or food)
  • Eats little
  • No pleasure in fun activities
  • Emotions feel as if the run together
  • Chores feel like torture
  • TV is meh. 
  • Start to wonder why you exist/purpose. 
  • Dark thoughts start (life vs death)
  • Sluggish with caffeine like it doesn’t work
  • Can not see the positivity in things

Level six

  • Doesn’t brush hair
  • Think of darkness and death
  • Does not want to think
  • Does not to do anything
  • everything seems to mix together and looks ugly

Level seven

  • Feel hopeless
  • Doesn’t shower for days
  • Doesn’t want to eat 
  • Doesn’t want to to get out bed
  • Thoughts of taking out yourself or humanity
  • Lazy
  • Bitter
  • Angry
  • Sad
  • Hopeless
  • Sleeping for long periods of time
  • Everything feels meaningless
  • Everything feels impossible

By levels six and seven you may need others to help you. 

I been on all levels. I try to stop myself by level four.

Anything can cause depression and you can start at any level depending on the trigger. 

Not everything happens for everyone. If you get to level five or higher get help. 7 Cups is a therapy website that really helps me. 

My Favorite Celebrities

My Current Favorite Male Celebrities

 

  1. Jamie Dornan                                                             (Actor/Model)
  2. Marcel Vigneron                (TV Chef)
  3. James O’Halloran                (price is right model)
  4. Gabriel Mann                (director, actor)
  5. Jonathan Brandis (director, actor, writer, RIP)
  6. Taylor Hanson (Musician, actor)
  7. Zak Bagans (Ghost Adventures host)
  8. Robin Williams (Actor, comedian, RIP)
  9. Nicolas Cage (Actor, producer)
  10. Kevin Love (Basketball player)

 

Honorable Mentions

  1. Jensen Ackles (Actor, director, musician)
  2. Jared Palacki (Actor)
  3. Ryan Gosling (Actor, musician)
  4. Neil Patrick Harris (Actor, musician)
  5. Paul Walker (Actor, RIP)
  6. Health Ledger (Actor, RIP)
  7. Jeese Spencer (actor)
  8. Nev Schulman (Catfish host)
  9. Wayne Brandy (Host, actor, musician)
  10. The Rock (WWE wrestler, actor)
  11. Michael Simon (host,   American Iron chef)
  12. Hugh Laurie (Actor, musician)
  13. Jack Black (Actor, musician)
  14. Stephen King (Author, actor)
  15. Tom Hanks (producer, actor)

Just because they are not on this list, there are a many male celebrities I would star struck with if I met them.

 

My Current favorite Female celebrities.

 

I am more drawn to men, so that is why this list is shorter. Hollywood makes women seek so picky, b*tchy and fake to me. The ones that make the list seem very real to me.

  1. Kat Dennings (Actress)
  2. Alex Guarnaschelli (Host, American Iron Chef)
  3. Anne Rice (Author)
  4. Kate Winslet (Actress)
  5. Rachel Ray (Host, chef)
  6. L. James (Author)
  7. Emma Stone (Actress, Musician)
  8. Kari Byron (Sciencist, Co Host Myth Busters)
  9. Katy Perry (Musicians)
  10. Emily VanCamp (Actress)

 

Honorable mentions

  1. Cat Cora (American Iron Chef)
  2. Kirsten Dunst (Model/Actress)
  3. Taylor Swift (Musician)
  4. Carla (Host, chef)
  5. Shannon Woodard (Actress)
  6. Angelina Jolie (Actress, producer)

My Top Favorite Movies and Shows

My All-time favorite movies

(If I had only to choose ten movies to watch over and over again. . .)

  1. Forest Gump (Drama)
  2. Interview with a Vampire (Horror)
  3. Beetlejuice (Comedy)
  4. The Notebook (Chick flick)
  5. The Fight Club (action, guy movie)
  6. Shriek if you know what I did last Friday the 13th (Comedy)
  7. The Crow (Horror)
  8. Sixth Sense (Horror)
  9. Dead Pool (Action)
  10. Star Wars Episode 3 (SciFi and Action)

 

Honorable mentions

  1. Titanic (Chick Flick, Drama)
  2. Repo! The Genetic Opera (Horror, Musical)
  3. Up (Animated)
  4. Shrek (Animated)
  5. Gone in 60 Second (Older version) (Action)
  6. Little Mermaid (Animated)
  7. Avenger movies (Action)
  8. Ironman movies (Action)
  9. Central intelligence (Comedy)
  10. Money Pit (Comedy)
  11. Bucket List (Drama)
  12. Transylvania(animated) (animated)
  13. Fast and the Furious movies (action)
  14. Wall-E (animated)
  15. Butterfly Effect/Donnie Darko (Suspense)

 

Current favorite TV Shows

 

  1. Big Bang Theory                                              (Sitcom)
  2. Guy’s Grocery Games (Cooking)
  3. Catfish (Reality)
  4. 2 Broke Girls (Sitcom)
  5. The Middle (Sitcom)
  6. Girl Meets World (Sitcom)
  7. Rising Hope (Sitcom)
  8. Criminal Minds (Drama)
  9. The Simpsons (animated)
  10. Chopped                                                                                                          (Cooking)

 

Honorable Mentions

  1. American Horror Story (Suspense)
  2. Myth Busters (reality)
  3. Ghost Adventures (Suspense)
  4. Dharma and Greg (Sitcom)
  5. 1000 Ways to die (Suspense)
  6. Supernatural (Seasons 1-8) (Suspense)
  7. Smallville (Drama)
  8. Family Guy (Animated)
  9. Haven (Suspense)
  10. The Chew (Cooking)
  11. Angie Tribecca                                                                                                           (Sitcom)
  12. 3 Strooges (Black and White) (Sitcom)
  13. Haunted or My Haunted House (Suspense)
  14. Two and half men (Sitcom)
  15. Cooks VS Cons or Beat Bobby Flay (Cooking)

2017 things I want. . .

It’s been ten years and I have noticed a lot of thing have changed in who I am and what I want.

This is my list from 2007

 

2007 in THINGS I HAVE WANTED TO DO (INNOCENT AND GUILTY):

  • Have my own place.
  • Have my own car. (Note: Paid and manage by me. Not a hand me down.)

(How can I have my own car when I freak out behind the wheel?)

  • Have a “rainy day” stash of money
  • Buy something I can wear that’s designer

(Really? I’ve never gone after something designer. In fact, I cannot stand dressing up and heels.)

  • Have sex outside

(I have a list on my naughty blog. I really do not like outside, especially with my sinuses.)

  • Wake up to a guy kissing me
  • Have a guy spoil me with nothing sexual in return
  • Be romanced (Candle light, bath, flowers dancing etc.)
  • Tickle and cuddle with a guy without sexual tension
  • Continued to be romanced

(I never believed that I deserved to be romanced and swept off my feet, but with Tom had a few really nice moments.)

  • Write another stage play
  • Finish at least 3 out of 10 of my scripts within the year
  • Publish at least one novel under my own

(11 to 13, I’m still working on my writing, but I have learned that it is a process.)

  • Publish a book of poetry It’s now smash words
  • Manage a credit card for one year and keep good credit
  • Fine a guy who fits my personality (someone who can put up with me) (RIP Tom)
  • Have someone throw me a surprise party (preferably on my Birthday) (Worst wish ever)
  • Go to Disney World or Land with my boyfriend (before marriage or kids of my own, so I can still act like a kid.)
  • Get the guts to sky dive
  • Sky dive

(19 & 20 I’m not sure what I was thinking when making this list, but not common sense.)

  • Have a friendship with a guy and have it turn into a relationship without it ruining the friendship
  • Get my scripts put on the “big screen”
  • Have a guy who looks attractive like me for me
  • Learn patience
  • Learn independence

(23 & 24 I’ve learned I need people in my life and I am not a patient person and I do not want to be. Why would I ask for that?)

  • To bake for my boyfriend (For Health reasons.)
  • To go on birth control
  • Not to have kids until I’m at least 29
  • Find a guy my age for an activity partner: Movies, music, darts, bowling, putt-putt
  • To score at least 200 in a game of bowling

(Now that is a laugh. I have bowled probably like 5 times in the last ten years, unless you count wii bowling and I have over 200 with wii bowling.)

  • To find a guy who will take care of me when I’m sick
  • Learn self-control
  • Learn self-discipline
  • Learn self-motivation
  • Be financially secure

(32 to 35 I just want to be able to be constant with my writing and eventually make a profit with my written artwork.)

 

2017 What I want now

 

  1. No kids, I want at least two cats
  2. Poly house
  3. To make money on my writings
  4. To finish and publish my writings
  5. To have my own agent and editor
  6. To have my own place with a nice kitchen and my own office
  7. I want to be able t dine out at least once a week
  8. Once I get a guy, I want a constant date per week.
  9. Indoor picnic
  10. More cuddling
  11. Breakfast in bed
  12. More massages
  13. More hours of soaking in the tub
  14. To know my mom and brother are taken care of
  15. Constant encouragement

 

Therapy: temporary distraction 

My brain needs to stop for a while. . . So I’ll need temporary distractions.

  • Online window shopping (my amazon app and put things on my wish list)
  • Candy crush soda saga
  • Music (genre depends on my mood)
  • Adult coloring 
  • Blogging (Any topic like this one)
  • Chatting (Maybe some roleplay)
  • Movies ( preferably comedy or horror)
  • Go take a walk  (Yes even at night,  but not by myself )
  • Read 

I just need to have some fun. 

I want an original idea

Stop already with the remakes of movies and the old shows trying to come back. 

Why are we doing remakes of these movies?

  • It
  • The Shinning 
  • Carrie
  • Flatliners 

Do those shows have to come BACK?

  • Roseanne
  • King of Queens  (under a different name)
  • Will and Grace

    Give me an original idea. 

    We need movies like

    • Forest Gump 
    • Sixth sense
    • Beetlejuice 

    I like the shows. . .

    •  the Cabin
    •  the Middle
    •  Big Bang Theory
    •  2 Broke Girls
    • Catfish
    • Izombie
    •  Angie Tribeca. 

    They all have their own uniqueness to them.

    I feel like Hollywood is going to the recycle bin. 

    We didn’t need three CSI or a bunch of Law and Orders. 

    Things That Make Me Happy

    Things that make me happy

    1. Getting an a long e-mail
    2. Baking
    3. Cooking
    4. Good Sex with lots of foreplay
    5. Hours of unbothered writing
    6. Writing 10,000 words in a day
    7. Finishing (reading) a good book
    8. A story with a good twist
    9. Not being able to predict something
    10. Soda-pop
    11. Going out
    12. Helping others
    13. Making others happy
    14. Cats
    15. Cuddling with someone nice during a movie
    16. Kissing and making out
    17. Getting actual mail: letters and package
    18. Bubble bath
    19. Having energy
    20. A nice walk
    21. Lots of pillows and comfy bed
    22. Good night sleep
    23. Talking all night
    24. Going to the zoo
    25. Sailing
    26. Swimming
    27. Good Morning Greeting
    28. Spooning: I like the inner spoon
    29. Flirting
    30. A good tone male hairless chest
    31. A fit six pack ab
    32. Bright blue or blue-green eyes
    33. A nice smile
    34. Hair on the a guy’s head that I can run my hand through
    35. A night of card or board games with friends

    The Small Things

     

    1. A good cup of coffee
    2. Candy
    3. A Sweet text
    4. Fried chicken
    5. Soda-pop (pepsi)
    6. New notebook
    7. New colored pens
    8. Clean clothes with tide
    9. Clean sheets
    10. First kiss
    11. A good movie
    12. A good book
    13. Agood joke
    14. Laughing
    15. Not having to put groceries back at the register
    16. Lilacs
    17. Carnations
    18. Writing a story
    19. Finishing a writing project
    20. Massage
    21. Writing several blogs
    22. A bubble bath
    23. Going out
    24. Ice cream
    25. Cheesecake
    26. Dark Forest Cake
    27. Time to write
    28. Music
    29. Secretly dancing
    30. Good night sleep
    31. Energy
    32. A good song
    33. Friends
    34. Family
    35. Body Spray
    36. a long drive
    37. Coloring
    38. drawing
    39. Painting
    40. Pie

    When?

    It’s interesting I saw the movie “Defiantly, Maybe” today.

    The character April explained something which makes sense to me, right now at this moment.
    “It’s NOT who . . . it’s when.”

    infinity time spiral clock, abstract background

    It’s like watching how peguins go for years looking for their mate, and they wait for that moment. (That was in the movie as well.)

    I feel I need to wait for when. . . maybe I have to learn something . . . maybe I simply have to wait until just the right time. However I am very impatient. . . I like this guy 1300 miles away, and we both have similar problems. I just wish we can both get over those damn ostabacles.

    I have some health issues. . . aminea, sleep apnea, and diabetes. (Not to mention don’t work well with my hormone issues, depression, and anxiety.) These problems keep me from having a normal sleep schedule and make it almost impossible to get even a part time job.

    Who knows maybe next year we will be together. . . I just have a hard at this point in my life seeing to the end of the week, or even just the end of the day.

    However afterwards, I usually understand that I am right place at the right time to learn the lessons I need to.

    I’m trying to find what my purpose it at this part in my life. I think it’s not about one purpose in life, but different purposes in life. As simple as cooking for family, to as complicated as working three jobs, and then writing a story and having cat naps in between.tumblr_nkacas3g2n1rg09p7o1_500