Dear Santa. . .

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What I want right now…

  • I want a house (shared with family) with my own space. I don’t need my own per say, but just my own space that I can make my own.  
  1. Desk for my working computer with a comfy chair
  2. My own recliner with soft sheet set.
  3. Place for my writing
  4. Bigger kitchen to cook and bake
  5. I want a book shelf where I can store my books. Note: buy more books
  • I want at least two cats. I want them cuddly and trainable. Yes, I have trained my cats, to beg for treats, follow me, and ask for food.
  • I want a place close to city where mom or I can find at least a part time job. 
  • I want a place where I can paint. 
  • I want a bathroom with a large tub, I can soak in.  
  • Internet and cable throughout the house. 
  • Good heat and a/c
  • Friendly neighbors
  • More friends that really get me
  • I want my health and sleep to get better
  • Honest people (No catfish and canceled dates)

Being on best behavior 

When first dating, I was always told you in need to bring your best foot forward and be on your best behavior. 

  1. No burping on purpose. (Mouth closed and always say “Excuse me.”)
  2. I have to hold my farts. (It really hurts to hold it back. It makes the stomach upset. I try to get to the bathroom to release gas, but the whole damn thing is embarrassing.)
  3. No garlic or onion breath. (Always have gum or mints or candy )
  4. Don’t eat out of plate in yesterdays clothes with mismatched socks. (You know you have done it or a variation . Lol)
  5. Watch how much you cuss or yell at the tv with bad sports calls. (I was raised with brothers who enjoyed sports.
  6. Be polite (9 times out 10, I am polite) 
  7. No being moody or b*itchy (it is hard to hold back PMS if they are jerk.)
  8. Watch my weirdness and creativity (It can scare off “normal” people.) 
  9. Need to shave all of the right spots. (It feels nice, but is a lot of work.)
  10. Dress up. (I know that guys want me to dress up, but it is not me. Unless you have a extremely nice place to take me, then there is no point in me dressing up.)

I am not sure if there is a guy worth all of this energy. I mean most of my best behavior isn’t really me. 

I am honest and can be a rough on the edges, but I am best damn loyal girlfriend you’ll ever have

Pep talk. . .

My anxiety, ptsd, and depression has really been knocking me down. Sometimes I’ve got to be my own cheerleader.  . . Here is some me messages for a pep talk. 

It’s okay to care, but guard you heart.

It will be okay. 
Things will work themselves out. 

Enjoy your writings (all of them:innocent and naughty.)

Always be crazy and creative, it’s a fine line. 

19 Unknown things about me

19 random FACTS about yourself that may surprise people.
1. Do you make your bed everyday? No

2. What’s your favorite​ number? 13

3. What is your dream job? I’m trying to do it, haven’t gotten paid yet. 

4. If you could, would you go back to school? Maybe

5. Can you parallel park? I can operate a car, but I get freaked out with other cars on the road. 

6. A job you had which people would be shocked that you once held? I got paid to keep quiet once, I gave them a refund. Lol

7. Do you think aliens are real? They may be, I have no personal evidence 

8. Can you drive a stick shift? Kind of 

9. Guilty pleasure? Chocolate, flavored coffee, bubble baths, and soda

10. Tattoos? Not yet, considering

11. Favorite color? Purple, black, silver, and crimson.

12. Things people do that drive you insane? Dressing up pets

13. Phobia/fear? Pregnancy, getting in a car accident, and ending up homeless

14. Favorite childhood game? Life

16. Do you like doing puzzles? Yes like tetris 

17. Favorite Music? Rock and pop

18. Tea or Coffee? Coffee

19. First thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? Singer

November all for me. 

I am not a selfish person, but next month is all about me. I am working on my writing and hopefully myself. 

My goal is in 2018 to move forward and away from my past.

I have two projects. . .  (Each project is 50,000 in 30 days)

  1. Finishing the The Broken Path 50,000 plus. 
  2. Working on the ghost stories for the Broken Path.

    I hope to figure myself out and do something for me, write. 

    My Current Soundtrack

    My Current Soundtrack.

    These songs mean something to me at the moment.

    1. “Bitch” by Meredith Brooks or “Crazy Bitch” by Buck Cherry (For my many mood swings)
    2. “Counting Stars” By One Republic (I am still hoping for my dreams.)
    3. “Unwell” By Matchbox 20 (Self-explanatory)
    4. “Demons” By Imagine Dragon (Fighting my temptation and depression in monster and demon form)
    5. “Monster” by Imagine Dragons and “Monster” by Rhainna (I’m either fighting the monsters or hanging with them.)
    6. “I’ll Be there” (Free Willy) by Michael Jackson (The world expects me to be a super hero.)
    7. “Infected” by Repo! Genetic Opera (I feel like my sinuses and health kick my ass)
    8. “S&M” by Beyonce (I’m a dominant, sensual Mistress.)
    9. “Things I wouldn’t Say” by Avril Lavgine (If you knew me, why would I have to say them.)
    10. “Freak The Freak out” by Victorious (I’m always freaking out nothing)
    11. “Take a Hint” by Victorious (Too many guys just do not get it, I am not interested. Do you match my blog, if not then why bother?)
    12. “Weird” By Hanson (I never seek normal).
    13. “Desperado” by The Eagles (I love singing this songs, and sometimes I think I will ended up alone.)

     

    Honorable mentions

    1. “Complicated” Avril Lavgine
    2. “The Thunder Rolls” Garth Brooks
    3. “Still Haven’t Found what I’m Looking For” by U2
    4. “Beautiful” By Christina Aguilera
    5. “Zombie” By The Cranberries
    6. “Created a Monster” By B.o.B.
    7. “Titanium” by

     

    Music is divided to me in different moods.

     

    Love Songs

    1. “Just as You Are” by Bruno Mars
    2. “Haven’t Met You Yet” by Michael Buble
    3. “Dream of Me” by Kirsten Dunst
    4. “Love Song” The Wedding Singer by Adam Sandler
    5. “Say You Won’t let me go” James Arthur
    6. “A Thousand Years” Christina Perri
    7. “Let Her go” Passenger
    8. “Collide” Howie day
    9. “Never Let Go” Hanson
    10. “Dance with me Tonight” by Olly Murs

     

    Happy or Encouraging Songs

    1. “Titantium”
    2. “This Time Around” by Hanson
    3. “Shake it Off” Taylor Swift
    4. “Wake Me Up” by Avicii
    5. “Happy” by
    6. “I Like to Move It” by
    7. “Cha Cha Slide” by Casper
    8. “Paralyzer” by Finger Eleven
    9. “Rock Star” Nickelback
    10. “Shine in a Bag” By Gorillaz Or “Pocket of Sunshine” by Natasha Bedingfield

    Inspiration Songs

    1. “Cups” (Pitch Perfect) by Anna
    2. “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons
    3. “Drift Away” by Bob Seger
    4. “You’ve got a Friend” James Taylor
    5. “I’ll be There” (Free Willy) by Michael Jackson
    6. “Imagine” by Mercy Me
    7. “I’m Sensitive” “Life Uncommon,” or “Angel” by Jewel
    8. “Need” by Jonathan Jackson
    9. “You Rise Me Up”by Josh Gorban
    10. “Shameless” by Garth Brooks or Billy Joel

    Sad Songs

    1. “Angel” Sarah McLachlan
    2. “Without You” Mariah Carey
    3. “The Rose” By Bett Mittler
    4. “Desperado” The Eagles
    5. “Chasing Cars” Snow Patrol
    6. “My Heart Will Go On” Céline Dion
    7. “I don’t want to miss a thing” Aerosmith
    8. “Bridge of Trouble Waters” Simon and Garfunkel

    Angry Songs

    1. “Bad Things” by Wednesday 13
    2. “Fuck the World” By ICP
    3. “Down with the Sickness” By Disturbed
    4. “Don’t Get Mad, get Even” By Aerosmith
    5. “Enter Sandman” By Metallica
    6. “Zombie” By Cranberries
    7. “Crazy Bitch” Buck Cherry
    8. “Fuck the Pain Away” Peaches
    9. 2w

     

     

     

    My Favorite Celebrities

    My Current Favorite Male Celebrities

     

    1. Jamie Dornan                                                             (Actor/Model)
    2. Marcel Vigneron                (TV Chef)
    3. James O’Halloran                (price is right model)
    4. Gabriel Mann                (director, actor)
    5. Jonathan Brandis (director, actor, writer, RIP)
    6. Taylor Hanson (Musician, actor)
    7. Zak Bagans (Ghost Adventures host)
    8. Robin Williams (Actor, comedian, RIP)
    9. Nicolas Cage (Actor, producer)
    10. Kevin Love (Basketball player)

     

    Honorable Mentions

    1. Jensen Ackles (Actor, director, musician)
    2. Jared Palacki (Actor)
    3. Ryan Gosling (Actor, musician)
    4. Neil Patrick Harris (Actor, musician)
    5. Paul Walker (Actor, RIP)
    6. Health Ledger (Actor, RIP)
    7. Jeese Spencer (actor)
    8. Nev Schulman (Catfish host)
    9. Wayne Brandy (Host, actor, musician)
    10. The Rock (WWE wrestler, actor)
    11. Michael Simon (host,   American Iron chef)
    12. Hugh Laurie (Actor, musician)
    13. Jack Black (Actor, musician)
    14. Stephen King (Author, actor)
    15. Tom Hanks (producer, actor)

    Just because they are not on this list, there are a many male celebrities I would star struck with if I met them.

     

    My Current favorite Female celebrities.

     

    I am more drawn to men, so that is why this list is shorter. Hollywood makes women seek so picky, b*tchy and fake to me. The ones that make the list seem very real to me.

    1. Kat Dennings (Actress)
    2. Alex Guarnaschelli (Host, American Iron Chef)
    3. Anne Rice (Author)
    4. Kate Winslet (Actress)
    5. Rachel Ray (Host, chef)
    6. L. James (Author)
    7. Emma Stone (Actress, Musician)
    8. Kari Byron (Sciencist, Co Host Myth Busters)
    9. Katy Perry (Musicians)
    10. Emily VanCamp (Actress)

     

    Honorable mentions

    1. Cat Cora (American Iron Chef)
    2. Kirsten Dunst (Model/Actress)
    3. Taylor Swift (Musician)
    4. Carla (Host, chef)
    5. Shannon Woodard (Actress)
    6. Angelina Jolie (Actress, producer)