Things that make me happy
- Getting an a long e-mail
- Good Sex with lots of foreplay
- Hours of unbothered writing
- Writing 10,000 words in a day
- Finishing (reading) a good book
- A story with a good twist
- Not being able to predict something
- Going out
- Helping others
- Making others happy
- Cuddling with someone nice during a movie
- Kissing and making out
- Getting actual mail: letters and package
- Bubble bath
- Having energy
- A nice walk
- Lots of pillows and comfy bed
- Good night sleep
- Talking all night
- Going to the zoo
- Good Morning Greeting
- Spooning: I like the inner spoon
- A good tone male hairless chest
- A fit six pack ab
- Bright blue or blue-green eyes
- A nice smile
- Hair on the a guy’s head that I can run my hand through
- A night of card or board games with friends
I hate talking when someone is drunk. . .
they get loud, frisky, and always seem to have argumentative ideas.
I either think they are always right or they have to save all of the world’s problems right there and then.
They also pull answers out of the thin air.
Why can’t just people drink quietly and go to bed?
On a bar note:
I hate being drunk. . . I’m afraid I will get taken advantage of. . . I have to be in control.
Many of my friends think I am looser when I had a drink or two.
Just do not get me to pass to my emotional drunk, because then I am a wreck, bitchy, jealous, and no fun.
Health wise . . . I have felt like I’ve been stuck upside on a rollercoaster. I mean I get a good energy day like the other day. . . I wrote over 4000 words, made dinner, help straighten the place up, made coffee, and helped with whatever anyone needed. Then all day yesterday I was drained. . . I could barely get out of bed.
I hate it when I over do myself on a high energy Why can’t I ever just have energy and get good sleep to do it again the next day? I mean on my draining days there are times even coffee doesn’t help.
One good day and I can be down for a day, a few days or even a week. When I am drain but up I get headaches and I feel like a zombie trying to focus. Grrr.
Between my zombie insomnia and my rough sleep apnea: a good night sleep is hard.
Why me? It makes it really hard to focus.
1. A good cup of coffee
3. A Sweet text
4. Fried chicken
5. Soda-pop (pepsi)
6. New notebook
7. New colored pens
8. Clean clothes with tide
9. Clean sheets
10. First kiss
11. A good movie
12. A good book
13. Agood joke
15. Not having to put groceries back at the register
18. Writing a story
19. Finishing a writing project
21. Writing several blogs
22. A bubble bath
23. Going out
24. Ice cream
26. Dark Forest Cake
27. Time to write
29. Secretly dancing
30. Good night sleep
32. A good song
35. Body Spray
36. a long drive
Warning: Adult Rating
I still like him alot—at least the version of the guy in my head.
It started out as two writers working on a few online stories together. Then we talked and shared personal stuff. Next we know the “L” word get passed over some texts. A few phone calls and lots of pictures. . .
Stress and problems share. . . words of hope.
Then nightmares and depression has me struggling to believe anything and makes me feel alone. My fear haunted me. . . that he catfished (as I have been before), that he is married, that he is not who he says he is.)-0-
We never met and the dark cloud in my head believes we well never meet and keep telling me to move on.
365 days of feelings, arguments, stories, chats. . . I enjoyed it all, but I wanted and needed and still WANT and NEED more.
I want to cuddle, kiss, make out, dance, have sex with lots of foreplay, sleep together, spooning, get have him see me be bashful and blush.
I guess the Fates feel we are just not ready for each other (yet if at all.)
I am not the type to handle a long timed– long distanced relationship with someone with similar problems as mine. Sigh.
It’s interesting I saw the movie “Defiantly, Maybe” today.
The character April explained something which makes sense to me, right now at this moment.
“It’s NOT who . . . it’s when.”
infinity time spiral clock, abstract background
It’s like watching how peguins go for years looking for their mate, and they wait for that moment. (That was in the movie as well.)
I feel I need to wait for when. . . maybe I have to learn something . . . maybe I simply have to wait until just the right time. However I am very impatient. . . I like this guy 1300 miles away, and we both have similar problems. I just wish we can both get over those damn ostabacles.
I have some health issues. . . aminea, sleep apnea, and diabetes. (Not to mention don’t work well with my hormone issues, depression, and anxiety.) These problems keep me from having a normal sleep schedule and make it almost impossible to get even a part time job.
Who knows maybe next year we will be together. . . I just have a hard at this point in my life seeing to the end of the week, or even just the end of the day.
However afterwards, I usually understand that I am right place at the right time to learn the lessons I need to.
I’m trying to find what my purpose it at this part in my life. I think it’s not about one purpose in life, but different purposes in life. As simple as cooking for family, to as complicated as working three jobs, and then writing a story and having cat naps in between.