Pepsi vs Pepsi fire

I love Pepsi. I Think its better than Coke. It doesn’t hurt my teeth or give me a stomachache. 

I kept hearing about this Pepsi fire. So my brother and I gave it a try. The fire is from cinnamon, but there is no cinnamon in the ingredients. The cola tastes funny, and it my lips hot tingly for hours. Now I understand the term “fire.” I hope they get rid of it, it was just gross. 


Three day scedule


  • Wednesday    meatloaf with roasted potatoes 
  • Thursday        chicken with corn bread 
  • Friday              subway

Gaming brothers final Fantasy rpg (I’m a moogle). 

  • Wednesday           a few hours game
  • Thursday                at least noon to 5 while dinner cooks
  • Friday                       not sure

Writing Driving Lies book three chapter 9

  • Wednesday         50%
  • Thursday           50%
  • Friday                extra notes

Notes for camp nanowrimo 

  • Wednesday           notes, check emails, research
  • Thursday               outline part 1
  • Friday                     outline part 2

This is what I plan to do hoping that my health issues do not get in the way. 

Extra note: Call for ride to therapist on July 5th. 

Current Warning

Because of my health issues and hormones still not balance. . . 

  • I can cry over something as crazy as the wrong color pen or simply at nothing at all.
  • I can yell or snap for no reason. (I hate losing control; I feel horrible after I snap.)
  • I can sleep for hours at a time, get tired out of nowhere, or can’t sleep well into the night sometimes all day.
  • I get dizzy and lightheaded easily.
  • I do rely on caffeine. I love sodapop and coffee.

I can get stuck into a computer for hours at time 

  • whether I am writing, chatting, or researching. 
  • I feel most content with a computer with the Internet.
  •  Computer games and Internet are big distractions for me.

I hate to clean

  • I will do it, because I hate bugs and spiders more.
  •  I clean better when I by myself with music and caffeine.
  • I like doing things on my own time. I try to master a room a day.

I am a dominant.

  • I dislike authority. You can advise me, but do not demand me what to do!
  •  I will not submit to any dominant male or female.
  •  I will work with you as equals if you are civil too and if we have to do something together. 

Im NOT an outdoor girl

  • I do not like bugs, snakes, or swimming in rivers or lakes. 
  • I burn very easily. 
  • I have horrible sinuses. 
  • I get very bad headaches when in the sun too long. 
  • I cannot breathe well in extreme humidity or bitter cold.

I’m not into drugs except what my doctors have given me. (However I do feel that weed should be a street drug, it does amazing things with headaches, depression, and nausea. Candy or tea is better than smoking it.)

I drink socially, on special occasions. 

I do NOT smoke, not cigarettes cigars. . . They make me cough. Smokers turn me off!

I have talked to myself, but I do when I am working on thoughts that are tangled in my head and need to be more organized. 

I am NOT a baby or kid or teenager person. I will be civil. 

  • I do NOT like holding new born or infants; I’m paranoid of dropping them. 
  • I will make small talk with a kid or a teenager, but do not give a attitude. I’m not here to watch them.
  • I do NOT meant to be a parent. (for a kid or troubled adult)

I am a cat person. Dogs are ok, but I love cats. 

  • They cuddle.
  • They purr.
  • They play.
  • They have their own personality. 
  • They are so cute.

Totally rocked dinner

My brother and I made amazing stuffed peppers with fresh tomatoes, ketchup, and maple syrup. I know it sounds weird and gross,  but in the slow cooker,  it turned out really well. It was the sweet with the pepper and spices with hamburger. It turned out really well. It taste just like something I would get in a restaurant. 

Just a good note.

I’ve learned that you have to appreciate the small things. Like my neighbor who shared a nice chat  and a cup of  flavored coffee, and a good meal. 

July come soon. . .

Fuck men, not in a good way. 

Fuck love. 

My heart is shattered. I can’t take anymore. 
July is going to be for me

I am going to work on my writings for camp nano. I’m excited, I have two projects I could work on. . . I will post more about them later in the week. They are both very naughty. Heehee.

Dear June 

Dear June, 

Please end soon.

This month has sucked. 

I had a good distant friend, almost more push away the relationship claiming the circumstances and distance was not going to work. Then after entire year of texting, stories, and Chatting (killing my minutes), stopped talking to me cut turkey.
Again this month has sucked I’ve found three guys who had girlfriends or wives and still wanted me to have fun with them. Fuck you. 

I’ve had four cancelled “dates.”

I had a nice date or so I thought, until the guy just stopped texting. At least fucking man up, and be honest with me. Maybe I’m too pushy, or
Maybe I want more than you do. . . But don’t have me worry about you. I don’t play the three day rule.  It is rude to say you like my story and then block me. Jerk.



Not greener

The grass is not greener on the other side!

I used to love the show “My Name is Earl.” They lived in a motel, ate out everyday, and helped people. Motel is not all is cracked up to be. 

  • I have 1/4th of the stuff that I used to. I’ve learned if you donot use it within 6 months, you never really needed it. We really do hoard, some are just worst than others. 
  • 4 people in one room, really gets crowded and you have no privacy. 
  • Everyone can easily get on your nerves. 
  • Cooking is a challenge with a crock pot, sandwich press, and microwave. 85% of the meals turn out pretty decent.
  • It sucks to have a small fridge.
  • Everyone fights over what is on the TV.
  • It’s hard to get the interest 50% of the time.
  • The smells mix and get to me.
  • My sinuses and sleep schedule go nuts.
  • My face, legs, and arms have a rash or hives, maybe stress caused.
  • No table or desk for my writing. 
  • I have ptsd, so I can’t work. I usually only ask for soda or food.
  • I feel like a hoarder, but all I have is lap top, some clothes, pillows,  and a few notebooks.
  • No pets, too much in a room with us, I miss my cat. 

When I watch the show now, I realize that Randy and Earl only slept in the room, they only ate what Crabman got them, and used most of their winnings fixing karma. I know I do not have that much bad karma. I have always tried to be a good person. Why do I feel like Im getting tested?

My wish list 

My current wish list

  1. My own place with wifi and working a/c (I mean really cold)
  2. One or two cats
  3. Fans in living room, kitchen, and bedroom
  4. A 15V computer cord for my computer
  5. Shorts
  6. Tank Top
  7. New shoes
  8. Extra large fold chair
  9. Desk or table
  10. Breakfast tray
  11. “Grey” book
  12. Light for writing
  13. Soda pop
  14. A nice guy who cuddles

What I want in a friend

I had this whole this whole detailed list written down from being understanding to being close my age, but never mind the endless restricting details. 

I just want someone who listens to me and does not judge. I want them to be honest, even if it hurts. I need a  constant person, who is loyal. I need someone truly have my back. 

Someone I can have fun with. 

They are hard to find.