Things That Make Me Happy

Things that make me happy

  1. Getting an a long e-mail
  2. Baking
  3. Cooking
  4. Good Sex with lots of foreplay
  5. Hours of unbothered writing
  6. Writing 10,000 words in a day
  7. Finishing (reading) a good book
  8. A story with a good twist
  9. Not being able to predict something
  10. Soda-pop
  11. Going out
  12. Helping others
  13. Making others happy
  14. Cats
  15. Cuddling with someone nice during a movie
  16. Kissing and making out
  17. Getting actual mail: letters and package
  18. Bubble bath
  19. Having energy
  20. A nice walk
  21. Lots of pillows and comfy bed
  22. Good night sleep
  23. Talking all night
  24. Going to the zoo
  25. Sailing
  26. Swimming
  27. Good Morning Greeting
  28. Spooning: I like the inner spoon
  29. Flirting
  30. A good tone male hairless chest
  31. A fit six pack ab
  32. Bright blue or blue-green eyes
  33. A nice smile
  34. Hair on the a guy’s head that I can run my hand through
  35. A night of card or board games with friends

What I want for 2017

Personal Goals for 2017

  1. I want to walk more. (At least three walks a week or several rounds on the stairs.)
  2. I want to lose weight. (80 pounds. . . ultimate goal.)
  3. I want to be more active.
  4. I want to stretch more. (No charlie horses.)
  5. I want to learn some basic yoga and be more physically flexible.
  6. I want my tight clothes to be looser.
  7. I want to lower my diabetes numbers.
  8. I want to try more recipes.
  9. I want to control my binge eating. I want to eat smaller sizes.
  10. I want to eat better.
  11. I want to get into the habit of three meals a day.
  12. I want to paint more.
  13. I want to read more.
  14. I want to save a little money.
  15. I want to meet my “wolfie.” He knows who he is.
  16. I want to deal, maybe even cure my anxiety and depression.
  17. I want to mediate more and be able to always access my happy place.
  18. I want to finish some of the projects I have started.
  19. I want to start some new projects.
  20. I want to help my ex get stronger and heal.

Things that Happened in 2016

2016 was a very challenging year. I felt really stuck and trapped this year, so I really didn’t feel I accomplished that much. I mean I didn’t even finish a book: writing or reading. However I have learned a lot about myself.

My writing accomplishments link here. . . https://rebekahquinne.wordpress.com/2016/12/30/what-happened-in-2016/

Things I accomplished in 2016

  1. I am working more on a day schedule. Eh, I know, but maybe I can figure out where to get more writing and editing in.
  2. I have gone to the doctor myself.
  3. I have gone to therapy by myself.
  4. I feel I have more energy.

Things I have learned in 2016

  1. I loved flavored coffee. (Mocha, coconut, caramel vanilla, and Chocolate raspberry are my favorite.)
  2. My cat will look all over the house when I am gone.
  3. I miss my cat very much.
  4. Therapy really works as long as you are open and honest with the therapist and yourself.
  5. I like cats sometimes better than people.
  6. I would be a good vet assistant or care-giver.
  7. I have less anxiety when I am busy.
  8. I live and deal better when I am on my own.
  9. I can do chores better when I am by myself (at my own time and doing it my own way.)
  10. I’m sorry, but I am not a baby or kid person. (I rather have a fur-baby that purrs.)
  11. I have learned I hate to be controlled or told what to do. I do NOT deal with authority well.
  12. Distance is just a number when love is involved. (still makes me sad my “wolfie” is not here.)
  13. I secretly like to fold towels and peel potatoes.
  14. I do not like being treated like a 15 year old who needs a babysitter.
  15. Not driving really limits me. (But I am terrified of getting in an accident again.)

Confession 23

I am finally starting to feel like myself again. I feel like I am getting my own voice back.

Since mid November: I have been taking therapy. I have needed therapy for years and finally had a break down big enough that everyone agreed I needed help.
It took a break down for it to happen. Break down

My therapy has been helping, and the fact that I am on my own has helped.

I do not deal with someone over my head.

I hate when someone tells me what to do.

I like doing my own thing.

I hate feeling like I am judged when I don’t agree on something.

I HATE FEELING like a kid. I am an adult damn it!

Did I say I am glad I am on my own?

Confession 20

10 Food Confessions

  1. You will get grumpy me, if you tell me I cannot eat something. Growing up, I got the “I’m saving that.” Or “It’s for your father.” Now that I am adult I when people tell I can’t enjoy myself with food, it makes me mad.
  2. I am borderline diabetic: I know I need to watch my sugar and carbs.
  3. I get very sleepy when I overeat. I love and hate holidays for that reason.
  4. I love candy! I usually always have candy. (I did in school, and most people know it.)
  5. I hate to count calories; I rather count words. I have written over 1,000 words today. (I also seem to love food with higher calories. Big Mac have close to 1000 calories.)
  6. My three ultimate comfort foods: mashed potatoes and beef gravy, lasagna, and extra cheesy bacon mac n cheese. (All have carbs. I also like a salad with everything.)
  7. I have cut back on my soda to once a day. (I’ve been pretty good.)
  8. I love when people get excited over my food.
  9. Three foods I hate: Canned peas, canned spinach, and liver
  10. If I cannot get thin, then I am making the rest of the world fat with my food.

 

Confession #17

I love Chocolate. 

  1. Any kind of Chocolate ice cream.
  2. Dark Forest Cake (Chocolate fudge and cherries)
  3. Chocolate milk
  4. Hot Chocolate
  5. Mocha

And the list could go on. . .

I usually will not past chocolate up. And if I do pass it up, those around me know I am not feeling well.

Chocolate helps my anxiety and depression sometimes.

chocolate

Confession #15

My head makes every problem seem bigger than it is. 

 

What happens when I do this. . . 

  • Problems seem impossible to solve.
  • People seem like I do not deserve them or that they can’t handle me.
  • I just get overwhelmed.

Examples

  • I get a nosebleed, I think I have some crazy disease. I research it like crazy.
  • I heard someone yelling, I instantly think it’s my fault, even when I did nothing wrong.
  • I did something wrong by accident, but I instantly think it’s the end of the world or I am going to get kicked out.

I feel I am always on my toes. 

 

Why does it to that?

  • Maybe it’s because my vivid imagination works over time.
  • Maybe it’s because I want an excuse to freak out.
  • Maybe I am just too stressed already between my anxiety and depression.

Confession #14

I am a people-pleaser. I will put others need ahead of my own. I am trying to learn to ask for help.

  • I want everyone to be happy, and I wish I could make it that way.
  • I could be upset, and yet I will still help others.
  • I will put back my own items at store, so others can get their items.
  • I constant ask people how they are even if it irks them.
  • I try to make people laugh.
  • I know what it feels like to be sad, lost, scared, lonely, and depressed. . . And I wish that no one has to feel those feelings.